When your soul wakes you in the witching hour to weep, let it. For as the body runs to the life force energy of a sun that is radiating, the spirit bathes in a lunar river of reflection. Questions of "how" filled my being. I'd been fighting so hard, pulling and believing but maybe always with a bit of skepticism. And then How Great Thou Art...I cried because despite my current predicament, God was still good. I was still blessed and my heart was still grateful.
So I tucked the "how" in and I simply let myself soak in what was sure to be yet another trying situation. Allowing myself fully to feel the enormity of the task before I would hand it over to God and submerge myself in the moon river.
Fix it Jesus. I said so earnestly. Not from exasperation but from experience. Knowing full well that this time it was my plan A and I would trust it completely.
And as the sweet lullaby played in the trees and the hum of my fan brought a breeze I wiped my wet cheek and I was comforted. I yawned. And resigned myself to rest, having given in to the heart, she could now walk into the water and rest.